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Phil's CDs!

THERE'S FIVE ALBUMS HERE, FOLKS... TALK ABOUT VARIETY!





If you're not one of those people that holds their breath and just wishes it would all go away whenever someone brings up the environment, politics, religion, corporatocracy, or war, here's a whole new album of silly songs in that vein. Here are a few excerpts...
"Politicians Are High In Protein (Use Them To Feed The Homeless)"
Click on a title below:

Take All The Water
Ode to Mr. Mulholland, who taught L.A. to steal water from other parts of the country, so we can pretend like we don't live in a desert.
Phil Van Tee
Love, Respect, Jesus & The Mouse
It's hard to know who should live and die in this world. What if you woke up one morning and found God in your mousetrap?
The Moth
Here's a little number about the dangers of sartorial excess (dressin' up fancy). Do you believe in reincarnation?
Bombs And Guns
Here's a love song to the arms dealers of the world.
Remote Control Us
Can't live without your remote control? Maybe we're under their thumb.
Icky Goo
If the Bard had a character named Exxon MacBeth, he'd still be trying to scrub out the damned spot.
The IRS Blows
This little ditty was offered up on Phil's very first album. This is a saucier version of the sing-along. (With feeling!)




Here are some excerpts from Phil's new Standup Comedy album,
"You And I Both Outgrew Ugly, But Our Baby's Got No Chance!"
Click on a title below:

Stalking Billy Bob Phil Van Tee
A Girl Named Pete
You Are My Moonshine
Pickin' & Grinnin'
More Pickin' & Grinnin'
Little Poison Frog
Brother Stanley




And here are some excerpts from Phil's original album of silly songs,
"Like An Angel, Peein' In My Ear!"
Click on a title below:

Phil Van Tee
The Epitaph Song
"Well, you're not gonna' be there to write your own headstone, but here's some amusing eulogistic sentiments..."
Cluck Old Hen
"Here's one like Grandaddy used to sing - a really old mountain tune..."
Squirt Gun
"A song about a puppy - the singalong part is: 'Squishy, squishy!'"
I.R.S. Blues
" 'Nuff said."

Phil Van Tee
Open Up The Window, Tommy
"Uncle Tommy had digestive problems."

St. Peter's Bar
"Raise a mug on the other side!"

And finally, here's a tune that was written the night of the 9/11 disaster, as Phil was reclining in the tub with a beer:
"Gimme' The Head Of Old Bin Laden!"



For all of you folk music fans with a sense of humor,
here's Phil's Folk Alliance album (with a sense of humor),
recorded live at the 16th Annual International
Folk Alliance Conference, San Diego, 2004:

"I Feel Much Better, But That Makes Me Feel Bad,
Cuz' When I Feel This Good, It Can Only Get Worse!"


Click on a title below:

Phil Van Tee
927 Pound Baby
"When Phil was born, he weighed just under 1,000 pounds. No, really... well, just listen to the song..."
The Dentist Song
"World's easiest singalong."
Don't Grow Old
"Peter Pan would be proud!"
Highway 405
"Here's a song written back in the 1800s about California's Highway 405."
Phil Van Tee
Stay All Night
"The original old mountain tune begged her to stay all night. Well, here's what happens when you get your wish."
Shady Grove
"I wrote this about my sweet wife."
"The Happy Song"
"Well there may be plenty that's wrong in this big old world, but dopes like us can just hum our way through."
"Apocalypse Downs"
"Goodness! It's the end of the world as a pony race!"
"Petro Junkie"
"If you're addicted to your SUV, here's your theme song."



and now...
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Like An Angel Peein
Children's songs for adults and vice versa. Copyright 2001. $10.
SONGS ON THIS ALBUM: The Epitaph Song · God's Little Friends · Cluck Old Hen · Houdini · Squirt Gun · I.R.S. Blues · Oh, No · Open Up The Window, Tommy · Nadine (A Ghost Story) · St. Peter's Bar· Gimme' The Head Of Old Bin Laden!



You
Standup comedy, bizarre songs and stories.
100% live performance, recorded in person before a teeming crowd (150 humans and 2 otters) at the Western Regional Liars' Festival in Wet Bird, Oregon.
Copyright 2004. $10.
STUFF ON THIS ALBUM: 54 minutes of riotous nonsense.
Video
Phil's Folk Alliance album, San Diego.
Copyright 2004. $10.
SONGS ON THIS ALBUM: Old Joe Clark · 927 Pound Baby · Oh No! · The Dentist Song · J.R. Brinkley's · The Capo · Don't Grow Old · Highway 405 · Cookie Tin Banjo · Stay All Night · Houdini · Epitaph Song · Shady Grove · The Happy Song · Apocaplyse Downs · Petro Junkie · You Are My Moonshine
Video
Here's Phil's latest, chock full of all the things you're not supposed to talk about at dinner.
Copyright 2005. $10.
SONGS ON THIS ALBUM: Take All The Water · Highway 405 · Anthems · The Happy Song (long version) · Petro Junkie (long version) · Love, Respect, Jesus, & the Mouse · The Moth · Bombs And Guns · Icky Goo · Remote Control Us · The IRS Blows · Apocalypse Downs ·
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